BHM ; Self-care for Black People

Naturally, Black people are beautiful and resilient. Therefore it is necessary for us to remember that shit as we navigate through our day-to-day lives and tasks. Most Black people grow up learning to cope shit rather than acquiring the tools to heal and take care of themselves. Now I will say I am so proud of our generation. We really advocate self-care. Learning to cope too often means learning survival mechanisms which breed dysfunctional codependency on outside sources.  Truth is, all the care that Black people need lies within ourselves. 

Healing and self-care are all about achieving inner peace in a fucked world. Self-care can never just be a one-time thing. You can’t just have a spa day or one therapy session and think that’s it. No. The key to self-care is discipline and consistency. You have to get to a place where you love yourself so much that you decide that you are your first priority every single day. EVERY FUCKING DAY, yall. And you have to allow this to become natural. When you practice self-care you are able to achieve more clarity, find a stronger sense of purpose, and you are able to show up healthier in your personal relationships/friendships.

To keep it a buck, racism ain’t going anywhere. That’s just the fucking truth but that doesn’t mean that as a Black person that you have to continously love in pain and despair. Black people must actively seek ways to bring more self-love and peace to themselves, to the entire Black community. Black people should not perceive themselves as forever submerged in white supremacy. You have control over your life. Black people must realize that self-love and liberation comes from within. At any moment you can choose to say yes to taking care of yourself. 

Wellness allows you to heal through holistic practices. Holistic practices present an opportunity to trust yourself, and for the environment to pour back into the human body and mental wellness. Believe it or not, self-care is not consumerism, it’s not materialism, it doesn’t have a look, it’s not classicist, nor does it have a body type. Self-care is for every human being on this planet. Black people are fucking brilliant people who must begin to take care of themselves not just on the outside but internally. 

A few ways to self-care is:

  • Get the fuck off social media. Social media has been directly linked to low self-esteem and sleep deprivation. I know social media can be addicting but even if you just delete the apps off your phone for a few hours, I swear you will get so much done. I have started doing this myself. Trying to stay more focused in the present and what is around me.

  • Develop a healthy relationship with food. Listen. I am talking to myself. LMAO. Eat foods that will energize you. You dont have to eat like a bird but, limit your white sugar and high fructose intake and you will see the difference.

  • Get some Vitamin D. No not THAT vitamin D but the sun. But then again…. LMAO.

  • Celibacy. We’re living in a time when the Black body is over-sexualized. Abstinence and celibacy, however, can be so empowering and healing. Challenge your body to seek pleasure in ways other than sex and create a deeper sense of self through celibacy. You can try it for a week, a month, or as long as you want to or feel is necessary. 

  • Toss out stressful situations. Society has taught us that intense stress and life go hand in hand, but that shit aint true. Stress is a normal factor in our lives, but it should never feel like you’re being drained or depleted. Start pinpointing the reasons for your daily stress and create goals to eliminate or resolve what’s depleting your energy. 

  • Buy Black. There’s no better feeling than knowing that you have contributed to Black economic structure. Buying Black-owned means supporting the economic freedom of black people. It makes you feel so proud.

  • Learn how to meditate and/or do yoga. There are so many virtual yoga and meditation classes you can do online. Silencing the mind and being able to let go of the worries of the day is so important.

  • GET A BLACK THERAPIST. Ain’t nothing worse than trying to explain Black shit to non-Black people. And let me tell yall this, finding a good therapist is like dating. Sometimes the first one doesn’t work out but keep going! Switch until you find one that gives you what you need. And go to more than one session. Therapy does not mean something is wrong with you. It is literally the gym for your mind. Please go. 

  • Get a plant. I can’t even really explain this one. It just works. The patience it requires to keep a plant alive is a lot. At least for me it was. However… I love plants now. Watching them grow feels good. I even name them. LOL. 

  • Accountability. Taking personal responsibility for the roles you play in your life is very healing. It’s hard and it doesn’t always feel good. But once you understand the role that you play and acknowledge your faults, you can begin to truly work on yourself. The world is a better place when you are your best you.

  • Know your worth. You are always worthy of dignity and respect. It’s your birthright. 

I wanted to end Black History Month on a loving note. I learned so much this year as I do every year. Please take care of yourself. If you need some more tips other than these, please feel free to reach out to me, okay? 

I love you!

Love,

Your Doula

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